I’ve got a case of the midweek blues

Just a short daily diary post today. I’m tired and my shoulder is still dislocated. I’m not sure if it’s actually popped out of joint fully, but it’s hanging limp and hurts a lot. I think it probably just shifted out of place slightly. It takes a few days for it to pop back into place.

This is what it’s like living with hypermobility. And this past week, I did some research into EDS. I also completed the Beighton criteria form for it and scored really high. I’m going to bring all this information to my doctor in a few weeks and see if he agrees with the diagnosis.

Every week it’s something new. A finger will get stuck or lock in place. A toe will bend too far back and feels like it snaps. My pinky finger on my left hand feels like it is loose. But I think the worst of it is the fatigue. Just tired all the time.

I slept in until noon because sometimes you just have to do that. I had a hot shower, made some coffee and am sitting down with some lunch. I’ve been wanting to go for a walk to get some fresh air but holy smokes. It’s 31C again today. I am thankful that it’s cooler inside. And we had a short – VERY short thunder storm last night. It helped freshen up things a bit. We’re supposed to see rain again today but very briefly.

We need a good solid week of rain before winter comes. The grass is so dry and that’s when fires can easily spark. Even with daily watering, my flowers outside are bone dry. The stems have all turned brown. I’ve used plant food and lots of water – but man. It’s been brutal.

Last night, I made an entire 6 quart pot of mac and cheese. But I think something went wrong. It turned into liquid goop. I tried adding flour to the mix but the flour was old. I think next time, I’ll cook the macaroni noodles first, drain the water, and then do the rest of the steps. I think that’s where my mistake happened. But I could have cried. So much food just wasted. I ate a bowl of it before tossing the rest away.

Luckily, pasta is really cheap. I just feel bad for tossing food out.

I also tried to place an order through Loblaws yesterday and holy shit. The price of food doubled. I saw a container of lemonade that sells at Walmart for $2.00 – it was $8.00!! I tried everything I could to make the order under $100 before giving up. I use them once in a while because I love their deli and bakery. Walmart doesn’t have much of a selection. And neither does the No Frills across the street. Safeway doesn’t deliver. So, I have few options to choose from here.

That depressed me a lot. I have the money right now but as a single person, spending $100 on basic supplies and food – that’s A LOT of money. I used to spend maybe $200 a month on food and would get about the same amount. Now, you’re lucky if you can take home the basics for $100 weekly.

The price of food has gone up so much. And now we’re expecting food shortages because of the weather. When there’s no rain, there’s minimal crops. The farmers are really struggling and that’s worrying for anyone who wants to eat organic or healthy food.

I also made a batch of basa fillets and asparagus the other night. The fish turned out slimy. The asparagus was stringy. It was inedible. I ate most of the fish up and tossed the rest away. Either I used too much butter in the pot or maybe it was just cheap fish. I don’t know.

What I do know is I miss cooler weather. I miss being able to turn the oven on and have a hot meal. And for that reason, I can’t wait for summer to end and fall to get here. This extreme heat is bullshit.

Yeah I know. I’m whiny today.

I’m tired. The pain killers aren’t working. But it’s the fatigue that’s getting to me. No matter how much sleep I get now. Or how much exercise I do. Or how much fresh air I get -which I’m outside usually for 1 to 2 hours every evening on my balcony.

That’s still my favorite part of the day. When the world gets quiet enough that I can sit on my balcony, listen to quiet, and watch the few stars that I can see. One of these nights, I’ll go for a late night walk too.

Anyway. I’ll end there. No one wants to hear a person whine.

I’m working on another blog post about relationships and will share that later today or tomorrow. I’ve got a lot of other great ideas too. I just need to sit down and get them written.

Happy Wednesday. How’s your mood today?

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