Tag Archives: depression

I did not expect to cry over this video message

Jonna Jinton is an artist and content creator from northern Sweden. I first discovered her when searching for videos about my “home country” – Denmark. The beauty in her videos is what turned me into a fan. She’s also a musician and a bit of a humanitarian and has won awards.

I did NOT expect to cry over this video message. If you have an hour and need some uplifting messages today…. watch this please. She collected videos from people around the globe and just wow. She received thousands of videos from her fans which now reach over 4 million.

“You have a reason to be here”

“The true religion is kindness. Let’s just be kind to each other.”

Trust me. It’s worth a watch.

And trust me – you will need tissues. I am bawling over this.


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A rant about positivity and people

This is going to be a bit of a rant, but I’m tired of getting shit upon for going through a depression.

Depression isn’t something you can just shut off. Like anxiety, it’s part of your genetic makeup. It’s a chemical process in the brain that happens when life gets to be too much. Sometimes it happens for no reason at all.

It comes and goes as if it were a living and breathing organism and you have zero control over it. Yes, you can take medications, go to therapy, do all the healthy things to “snap out of it” – but you cannot just will it to go away.

Positive thinking and attitudes are great. But with depression – you see the worst of everything until it finally passes. You might cry daily. Or sleep. Or isolate and want to hide and be alone in your feelings. Which sometimes makes it worse.

But what I cannot stand.

Is those “I need positive friends” all the time people.

People aren’t positive ALL the time. If they are, trust me, when I say they are masking their pain.

Sure, having a positive outlook on life can help. But people aren’t meant to be happy and positive all the time. Life is all about karmic lessons and challenges that throw you off your game.

I’ll say it again.

People who are showing positivity ALL the time are masking it. They’re putting on a show. Some people are just more open and honest about their feelings. And that was never a problem for me before.

But when you hit rock bottom – you find out quickly who your friends are. And those people that stick by you, will surprise you most. I also find that this is a good time to make a clean sweep and start over. Make room for new friendships and connections to form.

Dropping someone as a friend when they are at their worst or in a serious depression, is more about them than you.

It’s not normal to be positive ALL the fucking time. And while I don’t see myself as a “negative nilly” all the time – I’m not the type to sugar coat my moods or hide my true feelings about something.

So. This phase of my life is more about finding friends that are similar to me and real.

Because let’s be real.

You can’t just shut depression on and off light a light bulb.

You can’t just shut feelings on and off. Well, some people can but I’m not one of them. I feel everything and strongly.

When one door closes it – use that fucking door to let someone new in who will appreciate you for ALL of you and the lessons they could learn from you.

For me, I’m grateful for the new friends I’ve made in recent months. They have shown me what support really looks like. And I couldn’t be more grateful.

People are temporary. Feelings are temporary. It’s those that stand by you during your lowest times – those are the connections and people that you treasure.

Anxiety and depression doesn’t just “Shut off” at will. And those who don’t live with anxiety, just don’t get it. Find people that “get” you.

Grief. Time doesn’t heal all wounds.

I’m not going to apologize for not writing as much as usual this week. Sometimes I need to take breaks. And other times, I just don’t feel like cooking. That’s what this week has been. But I have some ground beef defrosting in the fridge and perhaps I’ll make a meatloaf and share my recipe with you later today.

I think I just realized why I’ve been quieter this month and haven’t had too many things to say. With COVID, things have been tough as you all know and probably feel for yourselves. My dad is in stage five with Parkinsons and he’s in long-term care. Cases are on the rise and they’re talking about another lockdown. My dad barely survived the last one.

With Parkinsons, comes dementia. Dad had a hard time remembering what was going on from day to day. He went from seeing his kids almost daily between me and my sister. To not seeing anyone for months at all. The depression kicked in. He mostly slept and cried all day, everyday. We were told he was getting the help he needed but he wasn’t.

We’re looking at moving him into the next level of care but this process could take a long time. Up to a year. I’m hoping we can move him closer to my sister so I can visit them more too. They live in Sherwood Park. If that’s the case, then when I move in the spring, I might move closer that way. It makes more sense.

So, I’m really worried about an impending lockdown. Not seeing my dad for months on end nearly killed me too. I live alone. The isolation was damaging.

The other reason I’m not too talkative this week. I turned down a funeral through the church two weeks ago. I played for a funeral last Saturday. And there’s another funeral coming up this Saturday and our family knew the deceased.

Music is something I’ve done for most of my life. It used to bring me such joy. Now with COVID, all the fun parts are gone – seeing people, connecting, meeting new people. It’s not the same. And funerals in general are hard. They’re so hard since dad got sick. He’s my only parent left. I’ve lost all my grandparents – years ago.

I’ve even lost some old friends this year. And it sucks when you can’t even go to the funeral because, COVID.

And so, grief has taken form once again. But I wonder – does it ever really go away?

This morning my neighbour was up early at 6:30 am and woke me up out of a dead sleep. I banged on the wall and fell back into a restless sleep. I had nightmares about the house. Bad. Bad. Nightmares. They’re getting worse. And it’s not just me. My siblings – the women – are ALL having similar dreams. But this one – it was like a bad horror movie at the house and my dead mother was the guest star.

Maybe I need to take a break from horror movies. But it’s almost Halloween.

I just emailed the pastor. He offered to have someone else play for the Sunday All Saint’s service and I took him up on the offer. I can’t do a funeral AND a candle lighting service. My emotions are just wrecked.

I don’t think grief ever really leaves us. Especially when it’s someone like your parent or a loved one. I think some days just are just easier than others because you can keep busy and distracted. But every now and then a dream will happen, or a memory is triggered, and you’re right back to where you were when you first lost that person.

Grief. They say time can truly heal, but I think some hurts never really do.

Living Well: The importance of a good night’s sleep

Regulating sleep schedules without the use of medicine or supplements

Sleep plays a vital role in our overall health. Not only is sleep crucial for daily life, but it is also an important part of weight loss and fitness. In continuation of my fitness challenge theme; and this week’s goal to improve my sleep habits, I’ve decided to share some of my favorite tips that help you “rest well.”

As mentioned previously, I am a chronic insomniac. The worst experience was back in 2014 when I was ill. Two months went by and I was surviving on very little sleep. I had been off work for several months and doctors could not figure out what was causing it. I remember one day I was so tired that I felt asleep on the toilet. I was burnt out.

That’s how important sleep is. You can’t function without it.

My longest stretch was about 120 hours without sleep. So, I visited a sleep clinic as suggested by my physician. I learned some valuable information and feel compelled to share it with you.

By the end of the 120 hour stretch, I was completely delusional. I couldn’t form proper sentences. I was seeing and hearing things that weren’t there. I was paranoid and thought the world was out to get me. My career and personal relationships suffered because of it. It led to really bad decision making – decisions that I can’t take back.


Why sleep is so important

According to my research from multiple sources, eight hours of sleep seems to be what the majority of health professionals agree on. If you’re trying to lose weight, getting enough sleep is crucial. Having a regular sleep schedule helps our bodies in many ways to heal and lose weight.

From a recent article by the National Heart, Lung and Blood Institute:

Sleep plays a vital role in keeping your brain healthy.

“During sleep, your body is working to support healthy brain function and maintain your physical health. In children and teens, sleep also helps support growth and development.”

Why can't you fall asleep in quarantine? A sleep expert weighs in ...

Sleep helps us to stay mentally fit and perform day to day tasks. Not getting enough sleep will impact your ability to drive a car, work on heavy machinery or even basic life skills like cooking, reading or writing. Even thinking can seem impossible with a foggy brain.

Sleep deprivation can lead to serious health problems and can have a real impact on your personal life, your job and your relationships. Your energy levels will bottom-out and you  may even lose interest in doing things you once loved. This is why fitness and exercise really helps to regulate your sleep schedule.


Some tips to help regulate your sleep schedule

For me, there are a few things that help me regulate my sleep schedule so I can get at least six to seven hours of non-interrupted sleep.

  1. Set a regular sleep schedule – in bed by midnight every night
  2. No naps during the week
  3. Daily exercise – but not past nine pm at night
  4. Plenty of sunshine and fresh air
  5. Drink lots of water during the day. No coffee past four pm

Clean your room and bedding often

Nothing beats clean sheets and a fluffy pillow – I sleep best when the bed-sheets are fresh out of the dryer. Keeping your bed clean and free of clutter will help you to relax and be comfortable when you lie down. I need to work on cleaning my room as well. If the room is cluttered or messy, I find at times I can’t relax enough to sleep. Invest in a large hamper for your dirty clothes and look into tools for organizing your closet like shelf hangers or racks.

Without spending a lot of money, you can “feng shui” your bedroom to help you sleep better. Get some blackout curtains, use a humidifier for dry homes, get some scented candles, diffusers – or use calming colors like pastel green, blue, yellows to calm your busy mind.

Pintrest has a lot of great ideas for bedroom makeovers.

elegant-serene-master-bedroom-decor


No screen time – at least one hour before bed

This means no phone, computer or electronic devices at least one hour before bedtime. It’s time to shut off your electronic devices and trade your I-pad in for a paper book. The glare of the screens can be hard on the eyes at night time. Give your eyes and your brain at least an hour to relax before bed. This is why I find being in bed early is crucial. I need to make sure I get at least six to seven hours of sleep to feel refreshed and alert in the morning.

Tablet and iPad Buying Guide | Best Buy Blog

Have a cup of sleepy time tea

One or two cups of chamomile tea with a dash of milk and honey really helps to calm the nerves and puts me in the right frame of mind for sleep. Chamomile is a natural herb that helps you sleep. It is caffeine free which is what you want to drink at night time. I’m a coffee drinker. Not a tea drinker. But the sweet taste of chamomile is a guilty pleasure.

This is something I really need to get back into. It’s June 2020 and I can’t remember the last cup of tea I had!

Does Drinking Chamomile Tea Help People Fall Asleep? | Live Science

Listen to white noise or nature sounds

While some people like me listen to music to fall asleep; I find listening to white noise or nature sounds can really put me to sleep fast. The low hum of  a fan in winter months or humidifier often does the trick for people. Sometimes I listen to nature music.


Hypnosis or “Talk Down” Videos 

The Honest Guys on YouTube have some great videos that can help you fall asleep to. I really like the twenty minute talk-down sleep videos. If you’re looking for more music suggestions, check out my post on music for relaxation.


Deep breathing exercises or “bedtime” yoga

Deep breathing while lying down at night time is a great way to prepare the mind and body for sleep. Yoga and meditation before bed can help with calming anxiety. Here’s a video on how to combine deep breathing and yoga for sleep.

There are many other things I’ve learned over the years to help with my sleep problems. Insomnia can really drag you down mentally and physically. But don’t let sleep ruin your life.

If I can change my life long sleep disorders – there’s hope for you too.

Regular exercise, getting plenty of sunshine (vitamin D), and fresh air really is an amazing way to help regulate your sleep schedule. I can count the number of nights I’ve had interrupted sleep on one hand. On those nights, I either went on a long nature hike, or spent a lot of time outdoors – or I took a fitness class like Aqua Fit.


Thanks for reading!

Hope you enjoyed this post on how to regulate your sleep schedule. What works for you? What methods have you tried to help you sleep at night time?

Thanks for all the comments and re-shares. If you’d like to use any of the information from this blog, please, I ask that you refer to my website in your post.

(this is a repost from September 2019 – but good information to share)


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The problem with 2020, is we all lack empathy for each other.

After hearing that a gamer took his own life today I’ve been lost in thought for most of the day thinking about empathy. I apologize for writing three posts today – I might schedule one for the weekend. But this upset me – I mean, really upset me.

I’m not a “real” gamer – but I have enjoyed playing games over the years. I got tired of Mincraft after a month, but then I hopped onto youtube last year and started watching popular gamers like Markiplier and GrayStillPlays.

It turns out – I was gaming all wrong. I had no idea the different things you could do in Minecraft alone.

Watching these gamers, has become a bit of a morning ritual for me. As I drink my first cup of coffee and eat my breakfast, these are the youtubers I start off my day with.

And even though I didn’t watch Reckful’s channel – I’m not into a lot of the games he played – I know the gaming community is hurting right now.

One thing I love about Marikplier is that he supports his other friends who are gamers. They all get together and do multi-player game streams together.

Mark gets a lot of shade thrown at him. I think it’s jealousy a lot of times. People are jealous of those who are successful and doing what they love to do.

I’ve never laughed harder than when the gang was playing Uno and Wade got so mad he broke his hand for real. It reminded me of playing the Atari with my brother back in the day.

He would get SO MAD when he lost games that he’d smash the controller into the floor. I have no idea how many controllers he actually went through.

I saw the news of Reckful’s death trending on twitter. I hopped onto Youtube to see if I could learn more. A lot of videos had already surfaced in tribute of the legendary Twitch streamer.

The sad thing is – and I talk about this topic a lot in this blog – he just did an interview three months ago on how he handles his depression. I guess he posted some pretty emotional videos lately to his fans. He’s been receiving a lot of hate comments, tweets and DM’s.

But the killer of this is – HE TWEETED up until two hours before his death.

Twitch streamer Byron 'Reckful' Bernstein 'dead by suicide' at 31 ...

Some are speculating that it was pressure on social media that contributed to his mental state. And as a fellow youtuber – I can tell you – the amount of hate out there on social media is disgusting.

It’s actually the reason I write this blog anonymously now. And why I don’t appear on camera for music.

I’m lucky – most of the people that come to my youtube channel are there for the music. All 49 subscribers. I get the odd spammer but for the most part – it’s chill.

I try to engage with other youtubers often and leave comments and likes to let them know that, “Yes, I appreciate their content and thank them for their videos.”

It’s real – you know. The empathy you can feel for someone you’ve never met. But if you watch them on camera almost every day for a couple of years – you FEEL like you know them.


Sympathy vs Empathy

What is empathy? People often mix up empathy with the word sympathy. Sympathy is to feel sorry for someone else.

“I’m sorry your mother died” – this is expressing sympathy.

Sympathy can be felt when a relationship ends, when a loved one dies, or even when you lose your job or something you think of as important.


Empathy

Empathy on the other hand, is when you feel what the other person is feeling. I think the term Empath stemmed from an old Star Trek episode and that’s what I often use to describe myself.

Emphatic people are often sensitive to other energies around them. When there’s excitement in the room, they feed off that excitement and almost get this high – like an endorphin rush. I’ve had this many times – like every registration day when I worked at NorQuest College.

When there was tension in the office, I’d pick up on that too. I’d get headaches or this tight feeling in my stomach. I always knew when something big was going to happen – or when we were going to get some bad news.

The whispered conversations. The meetings behind closed doors. Those are all signs that something is up.


Feeling what others feel

When it came to my relationships, I would often pick up on my partner’s feelings before they even knew what was wrong. If they were mad, I knew and would pester them for answers until they finally blew up at me.

Sometimes being an empath – is a blessing, while other times it can be a curse. But mostly, it’s a curse. It’s why I’m a homebody. Noisy bars, large parties – I hate going to these places so much. I’d rather be alone in the comfort of my own home.


Empathy and world events

In times of great sadness, like when a Tsunami hit Japan in 2003, I was working a short job at an Engineering firm (very short like six weeks). I remember walking into that office with my heart heavy and I didn’t know why. When I read the news later on, a light bulb went off. Thousands and thousands of people died. The earth was hurting that day.

And I could almost feel their pain in the air. I can’t explain how it feels. I just knew something heavy happened before I even knew it happened.

When 911 happened, I was glued to my television and couldn’t shake myself out of that awful feeling. Same thing happened again just before COVID hit – I knew something was changing. I could feel this coming on for weeks ahead of time.

I said to say to Wally often, “I don’t like this. Something feels wrong,” I said and he’d shake his head at me.


Empathy as a warning signal

Years ago, back in 2000 I think, I attended Canada Day festivities with some friends at the government building. The park was overcrowded and people were starting to get rowdy as they were waiting for the fireworks. It was hot, sweltering hot.

My head started pounding. Tony, a good friend, reached for my hand and started using the pressure points technique on my hand which relieved the pain for a little bit. But then I started getting that gnawing pit in my stomach.

I looked around nervously.

“Tony, where’s Lisa?” I said. He shook his head.

“What’s wrong? he asked me.

“We need to get out of here – NOW,” I said.

“Why? Are you getting – wait, what the fuck?” he said and looked up.

We both looked up towards the steps of the Legislature building and there was a SWAT team – dressed in full SWAT gear with batons.

“Get Lisa, we need to go,” I said.

Tony nodded, and we met up with all our friends a few minutes later at the parking lot. We made it out just in time. I don’t think anything bad really happened – but the SWAT team had started making their way through the crowd. We left and went back to Lisa’s place for a couple of drinks.

Some people might tell me that this was my intuition warning me that something was happening. It could have been – but I think it was a combination of being an empath too.


The world lacks empathy

I blame the advancement of artificial intelligence and advanced technology for our lack of empathy in this technology fueled world. People, including me, are glued to their devices. They spend so much time on their phones that they ignore the world around them – and people too.

I’ve noticed this even at family events. All the teenagers and young adults will sit around a table and they are all glued to their phones. It’s like they don’t even know how to communicate with each other.

The art of communication is going out the window at the same time.

The more detached we become as humans, turning more towards artificial intelligence, we risk losing that thing that makes us human – empathy.

It’s easy to hide behind a computer screen and lash out at people you don’t know because you’re using a fake account or troll account. It’s easy to call each other names – because you think your actions have no consequences.

But let me tell you – all actions have consequences.

And we saw it today – with Reckful. A beloved gamer in the gaming community who took his own life. It’s too early to know the reasons behind why he did it – I can only speculate that social media play a big part.


The Outrage Culture

I’m glad that I grew up in a social media free world. I spend more time on Twitter blocking people. We’ve lost the ability to “agree to disagree”. People lash out because of difference of opinions. The cancel culture tries to cancel something different every day. It’s getting to the point where we won’t have any nice things in the world because everything good has been cancelled.

People are erasing history, renaming streets, because they don’t like what the names represent. People are banning books, movies, television shows and lord knows what else.

And maybe that’s why I get so angry sometimes – because as an emphatic person, picking up on other people’s emotions – I feel all that anger too.

And it makes me sad – and it’s exhausting. It exhausts you after a while.

No longer do we live in a world where people are proven guilty in the court of law. Entire careers are destroyed because of something that happened or was said – on social media.


This isn’t a “2020 sucks” posts — this is much more than that

I don’t have any parting words of wisdom today as I write this. My heart is heavy and it is full. We lost Carl Reiner yesterday and that story hurt my heart. We’ve lost Reckful today, and my heart hurts – and I didn’t even know him. But I hurt for the gaming community.

I hurt for all the things going on in the world today. The things we’ve lost due to the cancel culture. The things we’re going to lose as people continue to erase history.

And I hurt – for losing the opportunity to learn from these things. Mistakes make us human. We learn from them. We grow from them. It’s part of what being human is.

So, I guess I’ll end this by saying – next time you type angrily on your keyboard or phone – take a minute. Step back. Re-think your words. Are they hurtful? Could they drive someone to hurt themselves? How can you express your feelings without insulting the other person or putting them down?

I’m all for keyboard warriors – but please, do it with kindness.

And this isn’t a “2020 sucks so far” – this is me – a fellow empath – who is hurting for all these reasons today. And I just want to let you know that I’ll do my best to make the world a better place.

Watch with caution – there is a lot of swearing which doesn’t bother me. But this may trigger some emotions for those who have been bullied.


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Self-care: be kind to yourself

Someone asked this question on reddit today about how to cope with anxiety. I thought given everything that is going on in the world today – I’ll share some of my ways to help with my own anxiety problems. I’m currently not on medication for the anxiety. I never liked the way anti-depressants made me feel. But I recognize that some people need more help. And I really encourage you to speak to your doctor about medications that can help you – if nothing else works.

That said – let’s get right into it.

Note: I am not a mental health professional. HOWEVER. I worked in Addictions and Mental Health for four years. I was part of the provincial lead team for Mental Health Capacity Building in Schools project and learned so much from my time working there.


Writing is therapy

This blog started as a way for me to vent my daily frustrations about – daily life. I wrote using a pen name which was great – until I wanted to start sharing some of my art and music with readers. If you’re worried about privacy, buy a paper journal and keep track of your thoughts on paper. Or create a private blog and only grant access to the readers you want to read your private thoughts.

For me, sharing what I’ve learned over the years with others helps me as an outlet. Sharing my personal struggles and experiences as a way to help others overcome their own anxieties – that’s what really helps me.

I have so many short stories and books in draft form that it makes me think I should really sit down and finish them. Getting lost in a fantasy world often helps to forget about life around me for a while.

I wrote an article last night – and didn’t notice but THREE hours went by just like that. I had to turn off the computer and force myself to go to bed. That’s how fun writing is for me. Getting lost in a world of make believe and dreams.

That said, if writing makes you anxious – then consider private therapy with a trained therapist. Over the years during troubled times, I’ve reached out for short-term counseling. I learned a lot of ways to cope with difficult situations or people in my life. It helped.

Photo by bongkarn thanyakij on Pexels.com

Creative Outlets

Pour your feelings into a creative outlet. Pick up an instrument and learn how to play music. Work with your hands – draw, paint or sculpt. Or learn graphic design – I use Corel Painter for this when I need another creative outlet. Putting your energy and anxiety into music will in a way, feel like cathartic release.

Cooking – I never thought that cooking could be relaxing. But there is something methodical about chopping vegetables and working with fresh food that relaxes me. Same with gardening and planting flowers. Really, anything you can do with your hands is a good detraction.

As a musician, I can attest that my own feelings come through in a lot of my compositions.


Get Moving

If sitting at home is doing nothing for you, then put on some clothes, put on your shoes – and go outside. Go for a walk around your neighbourhood. Go for a drive in your car. Join a fitness class. Or go to the pool when it’s safe to do so.

If you’re not up to working out, sit on your balcony or in your yard every day just to get some sunshine and fresh air. It really does do wonders. I love early mornings for this – enjoy a hot cup of coffee while sitting on my balcony when the world is still quiet. Those moments are rare.

Exercise is a great way to get the body moving, pump up the endorphines and it’s great for weight loss.

Cardio kick boxing – just punching the air helped me during troubled times.


Reconnect with Nature

Eventually as I lost more weight, I got into hiking which was my spiritual reprieve from the world. Being alone in nature is a great way to ground yourself. I found being near water put me at ease. I also listened to music while hiking. There was very little wildlife and no risk of bears where I hiked – it was safe to do so.

If you go hiking alone – just make sure to tell someone where you are hiking and turn on your cell phone’s gps tracking. And wear proper hiking boots. Runners won’t cut it in the mountains.

From a hike in Hinton – I loved getting lost in the beauty of the mountain side.

Meditate

I learned some great meditation techniques when I was in my early twenties, exploring the world of Shamanic journeying. Now, that I’m in my forties and don’t get out as much – I use music to meditate. There are some great channels on youtube that you can listen to. I’ve got a whole page dedicated to meditation techniques.

What works for me is listening to relaxing instrumental music.

Find a quiet spot in your home – bedroom will do.

Turn off the lights and light a candle or two. You can use incense – I like Dragon’s Blood for meditations but any incense will work. Jasmine and Lavender work well. If you don’t like incense or can’t have it, opt for scented candles or herbs.

Get out your headphones and make a playlist of your favorite music to mellow out to.

Lay down on your bed or find a quiet spot to sit. Get comfy. Close your eyes and just listen to the music.

Breathing techniques can help you to relax. Just take in several deep breaths – in and out slowly. Repeat. Until you feel the stress literally melting away from you.

There is nothing quite like the beat of a steady hand drum paired with a rattle or pan flute. This sets me at ease almost instantly.


Learning to cope with anxiety and depression

These are just a few things that I’ve learned over the years that help relax me. In trying to live a healthy lifestyle, I try to avoid drugs or alcohol as a way to cope. Drinking is something that I enjoy doing socially – but most booze gives me migraines. So, most of the time – I just don’t bother. The odd glass of wine or rum is fine for social gatherings.

I’ve learned that sometimes on a bad day, it’s best to stay at home or keep to myself. Spreading a bad mood around isn’t always a good thing to do. Other days, I just need to be around people. I know that is especially hard right now with COVID and unrest in the world. But with technology, I encourage others to reach out to loved ones. Pick up your phone. Call them. Hearing someone’s voice on the phone does wonders for the mental health.

Use video chat or face time when possible. Reach out to those that you think might need it most. For me, I call my dad almost daily. Even if he can’t hear – he’ll just hang up on me. But at least I’m making the effort for that contact.

Photo by Andrea Piacquadio on Pexels.com

Look out for you

It’s okay to say “sorry, I don’t feel like getting together today” or “I just need some down time to be on my own.”

At the end of the day, you are the one who is looking out for YOU. So, be kind to yourself. Know when to reach out when needed. Surround yourself with people who understand what depression is all about. Join support groups.

I hope you find these suggestions helpful. We all face mental health issues at some point in our lives. There’s no shame in it. All we can do is make the best of it.


Ask for help – you are not alone

And finally, if you’re in desperate need of help – reach out to your local authorities and ask for help. Here’s the help line for Canadians. Please – call if you need to. https://www.crisisservicescanada.ca/en/looking-for-local-resources-support/.

Stay safe friends. With love,

Wendy



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Self-care goals: how to unwind after a bad day.

This is a repost. I think it’s good information to share every now and then. You can also read my post on The Art of Self-Care.

Just a short post today. It’s been a lousy few days. Tired. Stressed. And contemplating when things started heading south. Last month – things were amazing. But the past two weeks, since I got bronchitis, it seems like my whole world has come crashing down. And I’m not sure how to pull myself out of this funk.

So, I thought I’d share some tips on how I survive bad days like today – when it seems like the entire world is crashing around you all at once. Ever feel like you’re drowning and you can’t get out of the water? Yeah, that’s where we are today. I’ve sunken to a new low.

But then I’ll wake up tomorrow and it will be a new day. I’ll feel rested. And it will be a new day.

How do I cope on days like this? The routine isn’t all that complicated really. It’s pretty easy. Even you can do this.

Adult, Bath, Bathtub, Blur, Indoors, Leisure

Coping tips for really, really, bad days.

Make a nice hot cooked meal like my mum used to make.

It reminds me of her. There’s just something about the taste of a roast beef soaked in gravy, a side of roasted vegetables and mashed potatoes. Really. Nothing makes me feel like “home” more than this.

Watch animals and babies do funny things on YouTube

Watch dogs and cats doing silly things. Find funny videos of babies laughing. Laughing really is the best medicine. Also, watching people falling – video compilations. I shouldn’t love these as much as I do. But they really perk you up. Or maybe I’m just sadistic that way.

Reach out to a friend in need

Call a friend and chat with someone who is also going through a difficult time. Misery loves company. But sometimes you just need to vent to someone who understands. I did this when I got home. Had a good chat with a colleague and I feel a little better now. I’m not the only one going through a rough patch. We’ve all been there.

Find comfort – hot bath, soak in a hot tub or steam room

Having a warm bath with epsom salts really does work wonders on stress. Dim the lights. Bring out the candles. Lower yourself into the tub. Lean back with a water pillow. Put a facecloth over your eyes. And just relax. Block the rest of the world out. You deserve this.

Pour yourself a hot up herbal tea or a warm cup of cocoa

Polish the night off with a hot cup of Chamomile or Lemon tea. Chamomile is a herb that helps you wind down. It can also help you sleep. Fun fact – you can also use cool Chamomile tea for for a skin rinse. Not a tea drinker? No problem. A warm cup of cocoa can help. Add a dash of cinnamon or nutmeg to top it off. A few marshmallow if you’re not on a diet – to sweeten the deal.

Shut the world out -with music

Sit back in your reclining or rocker chair. Your couch or bed will suffice. Grab your noise canceling headphones. Turn on your favorite movie. Close your eyes. Let the soothing sounds of an acoustic guitar or dreamy instrumentals take you to another world.

Tell me, what do you on when you have a bad day? How do you cope?

For me – it’s always going to be music. And on that note – I hear my bed calling my name.