social media | Charmed Reflections

Tonight while binge watching season two of Sex and the City, I hopped onto Facebook to see what was happening. Someone from my old office made the announcement that she was leaving the site to focus on her family. And while the thought of not seeing her adorable baby photos, I have to admit – I totally understand the decision. I sent her a private message and wished her well – encouraging her to continue posting baby photos on Instagram.

Some of my favorite people in the world don’t use social media at all. Like Keanu Reeves. It may be why I like him so much. There’s a bit of a mystery to him.

People ask me all the time how I can stand to be on Facebook with all the politics and the drama as of late. To be completely honest, the answer is simple. I just ignore it. It’s that easy.

The only reason I still use Facebook is to keep in touch with friends and family that I don’t see often in person. Like my cousins in Denmark and older friends who are afraid to go out while the beer bug is still happening around the globe.

I have a love-loathe-hate relationship with Facebook. I love it for the marketplace as I often check to see what kind of home rentals are on the market. I also picked up my last piano from there. But every third post is an advertisement of something I was thinking of buying and it feels so intrusive.

When it comes to Facebook games and apps – I just don’t use them. And as for anyone posting extreme political views (as in overly aggressive, threatening or hate remarks) – I just unfriend them or unfollow them and limit my interaction with them.

There are those friends that you can have a serious and intellectual discussion with while respecting each other’s viewpoints. And then there are those who are toxic influences who want nothing more than to tell you that you are a horrible and bigoted person for your beliefs.

Like recently someone asked me if I had canceled my Netflix account yet and I said… to their dismay: Hell no. Why would I? This time next week the cancel culture will forget why they even canceled their accounts and will move onto something else.

Social Media Detox

When I left my job to go on health leave, I removed all of my colleagues from my friend’s list and took a long break from posting or interacting with people. It felt good. It helped me heal from the anxiety from being ill, and it kind of served as a proverbial “detoxing” of my life.

I removed all those people who no longer served a purpose in my life. Anyone who caused unnecessary stress or drama – instantly removed. And it was a HUGE relief.

Over time, I slowly started adding those people I could trust and my friend Jo was one of them. The list of trusted colleagues is very small. But I can openly discuss this now — but that’s a story for another day. I’m “in between jobs” at the moment.

When it comes to social media, I think we all spend a little too much time online. If it weren’t for this blog and my music, I probably wouldn’t use social media as much as I do. Twitter is a disgusting and vile place to be sometimes with today’s cancel culture. But at the same time, I’ve met some pretty awesome local artists that I have a lot in common with. It’s fun to share stories of our city and experiences. I also get a lot of my news from Twitter.

Instagram is a place where I share pictures of food and the occasional selfie. Those are rare these days as there’s nothing exciting going on at home. I use Instagram mainly to stalk my favorite musicians and celebrities. I unfollow anyone who is overly political or that I don’t see eye to eye with. Why? It’s just less drama.

Plus…. I love these videos and collaborations with Hugh Jackman and Ryan Reynolds. Who wouldn’t? Both are absolute dreamboats.

Talk about things you love

Even when it comes to using sites like Reddit – I’ve learned to avoid politically charged discussions, sticking to my favorite television show subs like Sex and the City or Xfiles. I love giving advice to new cooks and discussing food, music and all the fun things in life.

And when it comes to WordPress, I’m a terrible reader. I mostly just stalk the website to see what my stats are for the day and compare to other days to see if I need to change up my posting schedule. Which I do often. Did you know Mondays are my most popular days? Well, you do know that now!

Youtube. What can I say about youtube. I love this site for learning new cooking skills, recipes and even technical stuff. I have a few channels I watch daily about celebrity or Hollywood gossip like the Johnny Depp and Amber Heard lawsuits.

Youtube is one of those places where you can easily get lost down the rabbit hole. You start off watching a vegetable casserole cooking video and five hours later find yourself watching an old interview with Joe Rogan and Elon Musk. Or you stumble across Ryan’s youtube channel and see him insulting Josh Brolin.

Don’t argue with the trolls – they want you to react.

Do I have a point with this post? I don’t know. Maybe I’m just rambling and sending thoughts out to the universe again.

I think people get too personal and too involved when it comes to politically charged discussions on social media sites like Facebook and Twitter. Even I’m at fault for letting trolls get the better of me from time to time.

It’s good every now and then to just remove yourself from the toxic environment. Take a break. Unfollow those who no longer serve a purpose in your life. Are you getting into daily arguments with someone you haven’t seen in twenty years and have no interest in meeting for coffee? Then let it go! Move on. Trust me. There are better things you can do be doing with your time.

Every now and then I go through my friend’s list and “purge” them. My Facebook friend’s list is at a whopping 120 friends. Instagram is even less at 102 friends. Youtube is at 60 on my music channel.

For me, it’s not a popularity contest. I don’t need thousands of friends online. I don’t need to spend my time arguing with people I’m never going to meet. And I don’t need to get into heated debates about something I have absolutely no control over like politics or taxes.

Moving On – Letting Go

What I will continue to do – is gush over adorable baby photos. Share some of my best creations in the kitchen and on the piano. And maybe leave the odd comment like “way to go” or “that’s awesome” to spread some positive vibes out into the universe.

Because at the end of the day – isn’t that what we all could use a little more of? A little love? A little positive reinforcement? A little encouragement? A little note saying, “hey, I know we haven’t seen each other in a while, but I’m thinking of you,” just to let that person know they mean something to you.

So, next time you find yourself arguing with a random person on the internet – take a step back. Take a break. Don’t let the internet or social media control your life. You’re better than that.

And if you need even more positive encouragement in this messed up world. Here’s a message from The Beatles.

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Good morning! It’s a bright and sunny Thursday morning. I’m sitting in my living room anxiously awaiting the painter. Today’s the last day of painting and I can’t wait to get my condo back into shape. I have things to do. Places to be. And new projects to work on.

Can you believe it’s been six months since I started this blog? Mostly Single was created in April 2019 as a way to help keep motivated on my fitness journey. But I realized that fitness wasn’t something I was passionate about – and so I started neglecting this blog.

Even though I’ve tried breaking up with music many times over the years, it keeps calling me back again and again. I bit the bullet this week and ordered a new midi keyboard. Unfortunately, it was a piece of you know what. It’s boxed up and ready to be shipped back to Amazon. My first return! I hope I don’t get banned – I’ve heard that’s possible.

So, what has happened in six months? A lot!

Even though “Mostly Single” is now defunct, I have given this blog a complete overhaul and started fresh. But don’t worry. A lot of my articles are saved in draft form – to be repurposed and republished later. Now I can focus more on the positive things in life – DIY projects, music, writing, and whatever life throws my way.

I will be shopping for a new MIDI keyboard very soon. Once the renovations have been completed and my condo is back to normal. It currently looks like a war zone. I have several music projects I want to get done – including a long awaited Christmas album. Yikes. It’s almost Christmas.

DIY Projects & Home Improvement

Over the years, I’ve done a lot of DIY projects but haven’t documented them. I learned to make jewelry, went through a Picasso phase and painted everything I could get my hands on, went through a photography phase. And now – I’m entering into a new phase of DIY home improvements and refurnishing furniture.

I’m moving in the spring into my dream condo. The condo needs some love. And my furniture – rather than buying all new furniture to match the decor, I had a brilliant idea of stripping the cheap Ikea shelves and cabinets – and making them look fresh and modern.

I inherited some items from my dad’s house. Vintage wood from the 70’s. I’m not sure if I’ll be refinishing them. Maybe just a touch up on the top. I also took my mum’s desk that has been in the family for decades. These pieces will look great in my new living room.

DIY Music

I’ll be writing regular weekly articles on DIY music tips that I’ve tried over the years. With 40 years of experience to pull from – I have a lot talk about and share with you. I hope to also eventually record some tutorials. But that will wait until I have my studio set up in my new pad.

Ad Free Website

As promised, this blog will remain ad-free. While this means a loss in potential revenue for me, I’ve included ways that you can help with covering the costs. I’ll be publishing an Amazon wish list soon and have set up a donation link via PayPal. Just scroll down to the bottom of the screen and offer to buy me a cup of coffee or two.

New Releases

I’ll be working on some new releases for this fall. I’ve already released “Remember Me” a piano single, and a cover of “Time After Time” which is pending a sync license. Once the new studio is finished, I hope to record on a regular basis. There just aren’t enough hours in the day.

Fitness & Well-being

Fitness is still a goal in my life. I’m eating healthy again, making salads and healthy dishes. I’m more active and do lunges, squats daily – I’m even riding the cycle again. When I move, I’ll have a fitness centre and access to nature trails. I just can’t wait for the lifestyle change. Being so close to the River Valley will be a huge bonus – I can get back into photography too.

Inspirational Posts

Yes, this will still be a part of my blog. People love these posts. I have a new series out called “Advice from my grandmother.” This series includes quotes, verses and sayings that my grandmother had written in her memoirs “My Journey.” I’m excited to share some of these with you.

Training at work has been stalled due to budget cuts. The future of employment is uncertain at this stage. A new government can mean a lot of changes in the work we do. We’re already seeing cuts to hospitality. When I am able to take courses at work and on my own dime, I’ll share my learnings with you.

Stats and Followings

This blog is now sitting just shy of 300 followers. I’m amazed! I expected to lose followers when I stopped posting. But the numbers continue to climb. I have a goal. If I earn up to 1,000 followers this year – I will invest in the pro business plan and ditch my music website. The pro plan has all the bells and whistles. But for now, I’d like to see how this blog does organically. Readers are from around the globe – reaching as far as India which is mind blowing.

Thank you!

Thank you all for being here. Especially for those who have been here since April and followed me along this journey and path of self-discovery. You’re never too old to learn and you’re never too old to change what you want in life. The key is to continue to make new goals and strive for self-improvement. And to take what you’ve learned about yourself – and share it with others.

Have a great Thursday – make sure to hit that follow button if you haven’t already!