Tonight while binge watching season two of Sex and the City, I hopped onto Facebook to see what was happening. Someone from my old office made the announcement that she was leaving the site to focus on her family. And while the thought of not seeing her adorable baby photos, I have to admit – I totally understand the decision. I sent her a private message and wished her well – encouraging her to continue posting baby photos on Instagram.
Some of my favorite people in the world don’t use social media at all. Like Keanu Reeves. It may be why I like him so much. There’s a bit of a mystery to him.
People ask me all the time how I can stand to be on Facebook with all the politics and the drama as of late. To be completely honest, the answer is simple. I just ignore it. It’s that easy.
The only reason I still use Facebook is to keep in touch with friends and family that I don’t see often in person. Like my cousins in Denmark and older friends who are afraid to go out while the beer bug is still happening around the globe.
I have a love-loathe-hate relationship with Facebook. I love it for the marketplace as I often check to see what kind of home rentals are on the market. I also picked up my last piano from there. But every third post is an advertisement of something I was thinking of buying and it feels so intrusive.
When it comes to Facebook games and apps – I just don’t use them. And as for anyone posting extreme political views (as in overly aggressive, threatening or hate remarks) – I just unfriend them or unfollow them and limit my interaction with them.
There are those friends that you can have a serious and intellectual discussion with while respecting each other’s viewpoints. And then there are those who are toxic influences who want nothing more than to tell you that you are a horrible and bigoted person for your beliefs.
Like recently someone asked me if I had canceled my Netflix account yet and I said… to their dismay: Hell no. Why would I? This time next week the cancel culture will forget why they even canceled their accounts and will move onto something else.
Social Media Detox
When I left my job to go on health leave, I removed all of my colleagues from my friend’s list and took a long break from posting or interacting with people. It felt good. It helped me heal from the anxiety from being ill, and it kind of served as a proverbial “detoxing” of my life.
I removed all those people who no longer served a purpose in my life. Anyone who caused unnecessary stress or drama – instantly removed. And it was a HUGE relief.
Over time, I slowly started adding those people I could trust and my friend Jo was one of them. The list of trusted colleagues is very small. But I can openly discuss this now — but that’s a story for another day. I’m “in between jobs” at the moment.
When it comes to social media, I think we all spend a little too much time online. If it weren’t for this blog and my music, I probably wouldn’t use social media as much as I do. Twitter is a disgusting and vile place to be sometimes with today’s cancel culture. But at the same time, I’ve met some pretty awesome local artists that I have a lot in common with. It’s fun to share stories of our city and experiences. I also get a lot of my news from Twitter.
Instagram is a place where I share pictures of food and the occasional selfie. Those are rare these days as there’s nothing exciting going on at home. I use Instagram mainly to stalk my favorite musicians and celebrities. I unfollow anyone who is overly political or that I don’t see eye to eye with. Why? It’s just less drama.
Plus…. I love these videos and collaborations with Hugh Jackman and Ryan Reynolds. Who wouldn’t? Both are absolute dreamboats.
Talk about things you love
Even when it comes to using sites like Reddit – I’ve learned to avoid politically charged discussions, sticking to my favorite television show subs like Sex and the City or Xfiles. I love giving advice to new cooks and discussing food, music and all the fun things in life.
And when it comes to WordPress, I’m a terrible reader. I mostly just stalk the website to see what my stats are for the day and compare to other days to see if I need to change up my posting schedule. Which I do often. Did you know Mondays are my most popular days? Well, you do know that now!
Youtube. What can I say about youtube. I love this site for learning new cooking skills, recipes and even technical stuff. I have a few channels I watch daily about celebrity or Hollywood gossip like the Johnny Depp and Amber Heard lawsuits.
Youtube is one of those places where you can easily get lost down the rabbit hole. You start off watching a vegetable casserole cooking video and five hours later find yourself watching an old interview with Joe Rogan and Elon Musk. Or you stumble across Ryan’s youtube channel and see him insulting Josh Brolin.
Don’t argue with the trolls – they want you to react.
Do I have a point with this post? I don’t know. Maybe I’m just rambling and sending thoughts out to the universe again.
I think people get too personal and too involved when it comes to politically charged discussions on social media sites like Facebook and Twitter. Even I’m at fault for letting trolls get the better of me from time to time.
It’s good every now and then to just remove yourself from the toxic environment. Take a break. Unfollow those who no longer serve a purpose in your life. Are you getting into daily arguments with someone you haven’t seen in twenty years and have no interest in meeting for coffee? Then let it go! Move on. Trust me. There are better things you can do be doing with your time.
Every now and then I go through my friend’s list and “purge” them. My Facebook friend’s list is at a whopping 120 friends. Instagram is even less at 102 friends. Youtube is at 60 on my music channel.
For me, it’s not a popularity contest. I don’t need thousands of friends online. I don’t need to spend my time arguing with people I’m never going to meet. And I don’t need to get into heated debates about something I have absolutely no control over like politics or taxes.
Moving On – Letting Go
What I will continue to do – is gush over adorable baby photos. Share some of my best creations in the kitchen and on the piano. And maybe leave the odd comment like “way to go” or “that’s awesome” to spread some positive vibes out into the universe.
Because at the end of the day – isn’t that what we all could use a little more of? A little love? A little positive reinforcement? A little encouragement? A little note saying, “hey, I know we haven’t seen each other in a while, but I’m thinking of you,” just to let that person know they mean something to you.
So, next time you find yourself arguing with a random person on the internet – take a step back. Take a break. Don’t let the internet or social media control your life. You’re better than that.
And if you need even more positive encouragement in this messed up world. Here’s a message from The Beatles.